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!!How-To Overview
----
New years resolutions don't work, simple as that. They are either
uttered while drunk, ill-conceived, or made in response to exterior
pressures that havenothing to do with how you want to live your life.
Most of us are either in the camp that make resolutions year-in and
year-out, doomed to failure, or we're so cynical about all of the
resolutions that we've made in the past (doomed to failure) that we
don't bother making them anymore.

But resolutions can be good, reasonable, and successfully achieved if
you approach them with a realistic, focused vision. This wiki brings
together a few tips that will help you conceive, organize, and follow
through successfully on this year's resolutions.
<br><br>

!!Focus on Yourself
----
Resolutions are about you and about changing your life for the
better. If you are in a relationship, work in a group environment, or
spend a lot of time with a close-knit group of friends, consider how
your resolutions will impact those around you. If your resolutions
will involve others, you'd better run your ideas by them first. Or
better still, simply focus on resolutions that will only involve you
and will only make you a better person. You may be surprised at how
your own personal growth canpositively effect those around you.
<br><br>

!!Identify Problems You Want to Change
----
The thing about cleaning up your act, as any program-savvy addict
will tell you is that you need to want to change. Responding to
pressure from your boss or your girlfriend is going to make the task
of sticking to your resolution really difficult if you don't want to
change. But consider the issue in all its complexity: are the rewards
that your boss or girlfriend may withhold if you don't stick to this
resolution enough to make you want to change? That counts, too. Don't
try to change something about yourself when you know you don't believe
in either the change or what you can get out of the change.

Conversely, if you don't want to stop doing something, you should ask
yourself why you think you should stop. If something you've been doing
all year is dangerous or in some way ultimately bad for you, you
should probably consider stopping. But if you are not hurting
yourself or others, consider  the pressures you feel to change and
ask yourself if responding to those pressures is really worth it to
you.
<br><br>

!!Identify Problems You Are Capable of Changing
----
Don't take on resolutions you can't handle. A resolution to kill an
addiction--smoking, drinking, gambling, porn, whatever--may not
reasonably be a matter of quitting cold turkey. A good resolution can
be as basic as deciding to not feed the addiction at the same rate you
have been. Maybe you need to put off quitting completely for another
year and focus instead on slowing down considerably. Be honest with
yourself about what you are capable of.
<br><br>

!!Clarify Your Steps to Success
----
Telling yourself that you are going to eat better is great, but you
need a game plan to make it work--something that you can come back to
throughout the year to put you back in focus. The best way to do this
is to break down the project into tangible steps that you can take on
a daily basis and which will add up to turning around a bad behavior.
The best way to do that is to get it all written out in front of you.
Whether it's a wall calendar or an Excel file, writing down the all
elements of the negative behaviors--in the case of eating poorly, for
example: not eating a nutritious breakfast <i>and</i> snacking on crap
<i>and</i> eating too large portions, etc--will get you closer to
being able to daily remind yourself of the problems that have become
second nature to you.
<br><br>

!!Don't Stop There: Set Challenges and Goals
----
If you are capable of quitting or drastically reducing a negative
activity in your life, don't be content with simply doing away with
the bad--replace it with good. If you are cutting out bad food, focus
on replacing it with good food. If you are cutting out wasteful
activities, replace with them with efficient or creative activities.
If you are spending less time with people who are creating negative
energy in yourlife, find some people who will help you create some
positive energy.
<br><br>

!!Tips Regarding Producing Results
----
The above is a well organized formula for identifying resolutions and
following through. But even with well conceived and organized
resolutions and mapped out action plans, things can still stop you in
your tracks. Here are a couple of things to consider in being
unstoppable around producing results.
<br><br>
<b>Focus on Being in Action, Not Only on the Results</b><br>
A common pitfall is to focus entirely on the results, and not on the
actions you're taking and who you're being about your goals. It is
important to identify the results because they define what success
will look like and provide motivation along the way. But consider
that any struggle you encounter along the way is a function of you
being attached to your success or failure in producing the results.
Stick with the formula above, and add on this step: Ask yourself -
"Who do I have to be in order to achieve my desired results? What
does it look like if I'm being that way?".

Let's say your resolution is to lose 10 pounds in 6 weeks. Envision
yourself being successful at week 3 or 4, or after week 6. Don't stop
at what it physically looks like, look at what types of behaviors you
are exhibiting that have gotten you success. Are you being someone
who is committed? Someone who stays informed and is willing to learn?
Envision yourself in circumstances where you'd typically take
counter-productive actions (like finding yourself in a candy store) -
how you are now behaving in those circumstances in your success
vision? Are you being someone who is free and happy? Someone who's
self expressed? At ease with how things are?

Whatever it is for you, identify that "way of being" and create it
now--instead of waiting for your results to show up before being that
way. Use that to provide structure around your actions (i.e. If I take
on being fully self expressed or at ease right now, how does that
affect my eating or exercise habits?), and make it the focus of your
resolution. Keep your desired results in close proximity for
motivation and to gauge success, but maintain your focus on being who
you said you'd be.

Think of it this way: At the end of 6 weeks the chances are that
you'll lose the 10 pounds - but if even if you don't, if you've been
being self expressed or at ease (or whatever you committed to) in
your life, you can't lose.
<br><br>
<b>Be Straight with Yourself</b><br>
There are usually specific reasons why we get stopped in producing a
given result. It's too difficult. It's no fun. I'm not achieving
desired results. I can't stop eating ice cream. Whatever they are,
consider that what immediately comes to mind is just the surface.
Identifying what's beneath them can help you to press on in spite of
them.

Don't be afraid to be real with yourself--make a commitment to be
insightful about what obstacles come up for you and what's behind
them. Take a look at what lies beneath the typical (surface) reasons
like the ones listed above. Are you feeling like a failure? Do you
secretly believe that you won't achieve these results? Do you feel
like you don't deserve these results? That may sound cheesy, but try
it out - more often than not there's a pretty heavy feeling behind
the surface-level reasons that stop you from doing something that
you've committed to. It's easy to shy away from them because they're
not always pretty, but realizing them will allow you to be free from
them.

Once you get to what's stopping you, refer back to your original
commitment and who you said you'd be at the beginning, and create new
actions based on your newfound insight. If you continually evaluate
what's stopping you and re-commit to your goals, you'll be
unstoppable.
<br><br>
<b>Set Up a Support Structure</b><br>
It's important that the people in your life know what you're up to.
Consider this: People know you as being a certain way - your habits,
personality, tendencies - and they relate to you based on who they
know you to be. If your resolution involves changing something about
yourself or changing your behaviors, let the people in your life know
upfront so that they can begin to relate to you in that new way
immediately - not only after your results are achieved.

Take the example of losing 10 pounds. If the people in your life
currently relate to you as someone who puts immediate gratification
(i.e. indulging in food, alcohol/smoking, hours of reality TV) ahead
of health, they'll continue to relate to you that way unless
something noticeable changes, or you tell them not to. If you want
them to stop sending you boxes of chocolates, urging you to join them
in a smoke break, or egging you on to play hookie from the gym to
watch Survivor, then let them know what you're up to. It can be
general support (i.e. I'm taking on losing 10 pounds in 6 weeks and
I'd really like your support along the way), or specific actions
(i.e. Can you help me limit it to one drink at the Friday night work
parties?).

Once people know what you're up to, they'll start to think of you
with that in mind. Choose people in your life who you spend the most
time with or who are the most influential. Before you know it you'll
have a natural support structure that keeps you in line with your
resolutions and goals.
<br><br>

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